Honestly I know that I shouldn't write about something while I am still emotional about the subject, but I am so frustrated right now I have to write about it here or my only other option is to just scream!
Ethan is the sweetest most adorable most stubborn child I have ever met. I don't want to give the wrong impression so to clarify - he's NOT a picky eater. He's just stubborn about eating. (If you have any theories, please - let me know!) He will eat just about anything. He'll even eat it fast! There is one catch though . . . you have to feed him or he WILL NOT eat. Maybe that's not entirely true either. You just have to beg and threaten him for every bite. Even things he likes - he just won't do it. You may think that he just is snacky and isn't hungry, maybe spoiling his appetite?? Nope, never wants a snack - not even treats or candy. Just plain WILL NOT FEED HIMSELF!
I'm going through a phase that I am trying to not break down and just feed him everything like I have always done. What this means for my life is hours and hours everyday of frustration and fighting. It's not doing well for me! I am loosing this battle. I am completely out of strategies! Last night he sat at the dinner table for 2 hours, not eating. When I would come in the kitchen with him and scoop up a bite for him he'd actually say, "will you just feed it to me?"
What do I do to teach him to eat and keep my sanity??~!! HELP!
11 years ago
9 comments:
Here is my suggestion. . . He will not starve. That being said dont feed him. When dinner is over clean it up and move on to the next activity. Come breakfast he will probaly be hungry and will eat by himself. It sounds like this is becoming a power struggle which your only option is to win at all costs and that isn't good for either of you. I wouldn't make it a big deal and if he won't eat don't make him and he will come around.
In my experience bribing works wonders, and everyone usually gets what they want in the end.
This is what I would do- I would buy 4 toys. Three would be smaller that 1 of them. Then I would place them up high were he could see them from the kitchen table but couldn't get to them. (If he is a climber then you might have to do something else) Then I would tell him that at the end of the week (or whatever time you think is realistic for Ethan) you get one of the toys, if you eat your own food, and the next week the same thing and so on, until you earn the biggest prize!
You could even take him to the store and let him pick out the toys but not tell him why you are buying them. Until you are trying to get him to eat dinner...
Anyway, you have probably already tried this... It's not a new concept, but I just thought I'd throw it out there.
Stephanie took the words right out of my mouth. Don't let it escalate, tell him that when dinner is over that there will be no food until the next meal and then just clean up at the end of dinner or breakfast or lunch and by the time the next meal or maybe even the next one comes around he will eat. Definately sounds like a power struggle, maybe brought on by the new baby in the house. Kaden went haywire when Grace was born. He was just so hard to handle, he even got kicked out of nursery a few times. Once we got a regular routine in place and things got back to normal he settled right down. Be patient but don't give in! It's the only way! Try Carrilyn's method as a last resort. I don't suscribe to bribing kids. Maybe a reward, but not a bribe. I do think there is a difference.
Ok so I have no ideas to help, but I love your sledding hill! Ever since I read about it a few weeks ago I have been begging Mic to make us one..with no such luck! But it totally makes me laugh!
After reading what the others have suggested I agree hole heartedly! I think it is a power struggle, and it will only take a few meals before he is hungry enough just to do it!
I'm with Stephanie. Just pick a day and let him know that it's the day that you aren't going to feed him anymore. To ease the blow, it might be fun to talk about it in advance and go pick out a new place setting for him--they have cute kids themed ones at Target. Maybe you could even make his favorite food for dinner that night. Then after you've let him know you're no longer feeding him you just have to follow through and not give in-no matter how hard it is. It will be hard. He will cry and maybe even scream and yell, but he won't starve. Eventually he will be hungry enough to feed himself. If you stick to the new rules without deviation, he'll know that you mean business and the fight will be over sooner than later. Good luck!
sweet Kerry! So good to see your family!!! I didn't know you have a blog. I hope you don't mind I added you on my list so I can keep in touch!!! Hope things are well. I saw your adorable christmas pictures at my moms! Congrats on the new baby! So exciting!
thanks everyone for your advice, I'm having similar problems and you just answered frusterating questions for me! So here's another one...how hard should I push eating vegatables,or trying new foods that I know she (My daughter) doesn't like?
I've starting do this for Dilyn, my 5-year-old, I set the timer on the microwave for a minute and let her time herself to see how many bites she can eat. Well, it initially started out as you have 30 seconds to eat that bite before I put another in her mouth whether she was done with it or not. Then it turned into a competition against herself to see how much she could/would eat. I am not a big fan of bribes . . . it gets too expensive, they start to expect things for everything and doesn't seem to work with my kids anyway. Dilyn is my challenging eater. Good Luck!
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